In my last post on collaboration I referenced this TED talk on introverts and it really got me thinking about the power of quiet and the discomfort that it generates for most people. What is it about creating a reticent space that makes grown adults squirm? Why do we often assume that soundless equates to thoughtless? Why do we feel the need to fill the air with our words? Why is listening so difficult?

When I attended a 3-day institute with the National Equity Project last summer I was introduced to the exercise of listening dyads as a way to enter into experiential learning. I have to admit it made me really uncomfortable at first-when I finished my reflection 45 seconds early and we were stuck just staring at each other waiting in agony for the timer to go off. But then something happened…I had more ideas to share! I realized that by holding space for my voice I was able to further process my thoughts and it turned out I actually needed that cathartic release…I needed the quiet. Then the tables turned and it was my partner’s turn to reflect for three minutes. My mind raced with questions I wanted to ask, or connections I wanted to make-I wasn’t listening to what they needed me to hear. By being forced to be quiet I realized I was a terrible listener.

Recently I lead a training and one of the exercises I invited my participants to engage in was the listening dyad. Similar to my own experiences I watched people interrupt to ask questions and then continue to break the protocol when they finished early by talking about unrelated topics because they were so uncomfortable with the quiet. Then it struck me…how are we every going to effectively collaborate if we cannot be quiet and listen to others? How will we ever develop the relationships we need to engage in this very important work?

We often forget that we have to teach students the basic skills necessary for collaboration-one of them being how to listen. It seems simple, but in fact I’ve found that it’s not…even for adults! As part of collaboration, listening as a skill that must be scaffolded, reinforced and revisited often. Here are a couple ideas I have been playing with that I think are worth further exploration:

• Listening literacy exercises-I remember Rob Riordan used to model this wonderful exercise for writing with our staff at High Tech High. Students were asked to journal, then read their response to a partner, the partner’s task was to write down word-for-word what they heard the reader say, then read back “I heard you say…”
• A few oldie but goodies that I think could really help with holding space for quiet while also teaching students how to listen and synthesize is The Final Word Protocol or The MicroLab Protocol 
• I could see the Listening Dyad protocol shared above used beautifully in the classroom.
• While I mentioned it in my previous post on collaboration I think discussion norms and talk moves are also a really important scaffold for this skill of listening.

In thinking about equitable schools…because I always am…This topic seems significant for professionals and students.  We have to learn to listen and create opportunities for voice-in particular for individuals who come from communities whose voice has not been part of the dominant discourse. This will require us to 1) create space for voice and then 2) get comfortable with being quiet so we can truly collaborate to improve learning experiences for ALL children.